Stop! That! Train!

Listen, you took a $20 million budget, a train named the Glamazonian Express, a storm called 'Stormaganza,' and a sitting president named Gagwell, and somehow managed to not completely derail into a vanity project for the RuPaul industrial complex. That is genuinely more impressive than it sounds. You had every ingredient for a spectacular flaming wreck, and instead you made something that Screen Rant is calling a deliberate Airplane! throwback with a straight face and a 7 out of 10. Respect is begrudgingly being dispatched.

That said, let's talk about the elephant in the sequined dining car. You crammed in enough celebrity cameos to fill a Pride parade float, including Sarah Michelle Gellar, Nicole Richie, Raven-Symoné, Charo, Jesse Tyler Ferguson, and roughly fourteen other people your publicist called in favors from. At 92 minutes, that is not a cast list, that is a hostage situation. Every famous face you wedge into a 90-second bit is screen time you are stealing from Ginger Minj and Jujubee, who are, according to every review that matters, the actual reason this movie works.

And then there is the AI VFX controversy sitting in economy class like an unpleasant smell nobody wants to acknowledge. Your director denied it, which is exactly what a director who used undisclosed AI VFX would say, and also exactly what a director who genuinely did not would say. So that is helpful. On a $20 million budget, the VFX ambitions outpacing the wallet is a believable story. Just be transparent about your tools next time, because nothing kills the gay joy of a disaster spoof faster than a Reddit thread dissecting your storm sequences frame by frame.